My First Alcohol Fueled Post

Well well, I've had this blog for many a year and yet this is the first drunken update I've made. Well, if not drunken at least (as the title may suggest) alcohol fueled. This is what it boils down to:

• I'm listening to The Phantom of the Opera soundtrack
• I don't understand what the phantom does with 20, 000 francs a month, let's face it he doesn't get out much
• Unplanned binge drinking happens more than it should
• I got accused of being bulimic this evening, but I'm not sure if the person saying this knew exactly what they were saying
• I refuse to screw up a perfectly lovely boy
•  I'm leaving the damn country in two and a half months
• I've done so well not hitting on/making any sort of move on any co-workers, I have two shifts left and decide to start being a fool?
• I don't know if I'll be in Australia or the UK come mid February

Honestly. I just don't know what's up with me some days. Perhaps some sleep will help with my perspective. Goodnight interwebs x

God Damn It.

I'm tired and unwell and confused and maybe even a little bit angry, but mostly I'm upset and I just want a hug and someone to talk to.

Well, well, well...

The past 18 days were some of the best of my life. My second Contiki tour was the perfect antidote to the slump I was in before I left for it. The only down side to being so deliriously happy so consistently is that going home gives me a massive case of PCD (post contiki depression). It also makes me feel like what I'm living now isn't my real life. It feels like I've put everything on hold to run off to the other side of the world as a form of procrastinating deciding what I should be doing with my real life back home on Australia. And that's what it boils down to for me, yes I enjoy living here, I love living with my family over here and I adore that the longest I go without seeing some of them is two weeks, not two years, but Australia is home and I miss it. I miss my parents, and my little sister, and my friends and my freedom and my car and I miss having a life in motion, not in stasis. 

Dreams

I had a dream last night, I dreamt I was home in Ballarat.
My friends surprised me with a welcome home picnic in a lovely green, tree filled area with a stream and sunshine. After which I went out for dinner with my family and a few girls from the picnic.
I felt like I was home